The family approved tinder

Traditional, conservative, poor, rich, middle class, liberal, pseudo intellectuals have all approved this. Its the family approved tinder. The whole family goes through it and decides whether to approve or not to approve. The matrimony sites. The phenomenal business model which saw huge value in the hypocritical Indian household and completely transformed the idea into a huge success. Millions of parents are glued onto these websites to find that one suitable match which will change everything in their life. Especially the society and its people would finally say that Mr so and so got their kids married on time. It was such a fantastic function, the food was amazing and the couple looked so happy. That day the man(father) of the house would feel his life is complete and the lady(mother) would throw away all her emotional blackmailing statements in the bin.

Parents start posting their kids profile as soon as their post graduation is through. This happens especially in the case of the girl child. As soon as she turns 23, her profile is active on all matrimonial sites. Everyday few thousands of guys and families go through her profile and scan through everything. Then one fine day, an interesting family as per her parents( Interesting – great ancestral heritage, guy earning in 6 figures, OWN HOUSE, nuclear family, father a rich man) sends a liking towards her profile. The whole family gets together to ensure it works out. They accept in return and suddenly the bride’s father realizes the membership on the site is not premium so there are lot of things which he is not entitled to. He does not have an internet banking ID still created. He has an account with a PSU which is already closed for the day. His debit card is the only saving grace and out of excitement he types the PIN thrice wrongly and the card gets blocked ๐Ÿ™‚

Sleepless night, what if the guy finds somebody else during this time? The daughter s life if not screwed , will definitely go through a turmoil ?ย What if the family starts feeling that the bride’s family is not interested? What if the groom s profile is not visible from tomorrow? The whole night, the parents don’t sleep. They keep thinking all the negative possible. For the first time, the lady shouts at the man and makes him feel how irrelevant he has become for not having an internet banking password.

Next morning he visits the bank and ensures everything is in order. Reaches home and first thing he does is pays the website to give him all the facilities of a premium member. He sees the contact number and calls the groom’s father. Extremely excited and almost got his daughter married in his mind, the lady constantly feeling charged up seeing her husband’s expressions. Suddenly the whole excitement comes to a standstill. He disconnects the phone and sits , rather almost falls onto the sofa. “He is a MANGLIK.” Sadness, silence, surrounds the whole atmosphere of the house. The mother starts blaming her stars, feels some bad omen is surrounding the house.

Between all this drama, a self imposed drama happening, the daughter enters the house ecstatic to share the most important moment of her life. She hugs the mother and says that her offer has come through to work with this global organization and she will be working out of Paris for the next two years. It does not bring happiness at all to both the parents. What about her future, her marriage, kids? These questions are still baffling them. The daughter however walks towards her room and closes the door. The next moment the father walks towards his laptop which he specifically purchased to get his daughter married and searches for groom of the same caste working in Paris.

Now that brings happiness back to the parents. The girl can still get the man of their community even if she is working in Paris. The celebration begins at home and few relatives are invited to participate in the celebration. This is the story of most of Indian household. After a point, the only thing that makes every Indian parent happy is when their kid’s marriage is fixed or they see some prospects around them.

Are the parents in this country absolutely involved in their kids life? Are they really self centered to see themselves getting respected by the set of hypocrites around them? Do they feel that their kids cannot be doing anything better than marrying and produce kids? Is it a regressive society? Do we think the life has no meaning without a matrimonial website? Does it give us a high when lot of people visit their child’s profile and send interest?

I don’t know what it is but its a vicious circle and a trap where I am yet to fall into. Have kept myself well protected from it and have ensured that my sister also does not fall into this trap. We have a right to chose our partner and above all we have a right to decide when we want to get married. Fall in love and then decide if you want to get married. Don’t get married and decide to fall in love, you may just end up having babies and think it to be love and that will be your life.



4 thoughts on “The family approved tinder

  1. Very ornamenrally drafted and well written piece. It’s actually the real story…one can surely relate.
    I am sure WOW like few would surely not liked to be marketed in the way it is done. Sometimes I feel disgraceful while talking to such a hand picked figure….
    However even if I personally curse the socio-business tool….i have faced the other side too…which is again not healthy…what i meant is these tools are socially viable till the girl reaches 27-28 yrs, not more than this age bar.
    Standing at 34, life shows a more harsh reality where these business tools even become futile..
    P.S. This is a personal experience, may be I am not generalizing facts

    Liked by 1 person

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